Simple ask a silly question & the next person has to answer it.


Why do poor people smell like sour milk?

Because they use cheap aftershave

Why do cats have 9 lives

Because 10 would be greedy

Why is rudolfs nose red?

Because of the amount of time it spends up santas arse, it got a bit sore

Why do women have so many orgasms

Because i'm so damn good!

Why is the G spot in a stupid place?

Because if it was easy to find, women everywhere would be exploding

How to mermaids copulate

Why do you think they're exstinct?

Can fat people go skinny dipping?

yes but only in a ha ha


can wearing a rabbit on your head cure an ingrewing toe nail

only if you put your foot in it

which way is up

this way


can a book build a house

if its a diy manuel

whats the meaning of life

well they tell me it is 42, but i think it is 1353678565432876544.5467354325689674640087544768

can you drink tea through a straw

As long as the straw is big enough

Why does the best man never get married

because its more fun sleeping with bridesmaids


why do kamakazi pilots wear crash helmets

health and safety guidelines


why cant men fold towels properly?

because we dont want too

why do kids stay awake on a "sleep over"

cos they're too busy getting drunk to sleep


why do people buy the sun?

Because all land on the moon is already sold

Why does goofy walk around clothed & talk but pluto is naked & barks?

goofy stole plutos clothes

how many nuts does a squirrel have

More than he needs , And he keeps spares in his mouth the dirty git .

Why do birds suddenly appear everytime you are near ? Did the Carpenters have the meaning of life ?

yes, but found it it envolved not eating

why do women want to paint there lips the same colour as a baboons arse

Because painting them the same colour as a chimps is just stupid

Where does belly button fluff come from?

From the bellybutton fluff fairy .

Why do people say...Yuk that tastes disgusting..Then offer it to you to try ? .

So you eat it instead of them

What purpose does earwax have?

it helps to keep the ear lubricated and protects it from bacteria and foreign matter

why does kenco have such a stupid ad?

So people will say.... "why does kenco have such a stupid ad?"

Why are elephants scared of mice?

cos they get stuck in their trunks


why arent all frogs prince's?

Cos then the girl frogs wouldn't have anyone to love .

Why are wagon wheels called that ? They don't fit on a wagon at all .

cos theyre for mice wagons


why do sneezes come out of your throat sometimes?

Cos your throat gets bored and it gives it something to do .

What's the point of eyebrows ? .

they protect your eyes!!


whats the point of all the property progs on telly!

So smug tv people can show us all houses we can't afford .


Is Rudolph a secret drinker and that's why he has a red nose ? .

No -- Rudolph has a cocaine problem.


Is Santa Claus American, being that he's obese?

No, because people leave out mince pies rather that supersized big mac meals

Why cant americans spell words like colour?

They all had bad teachers .

Why can't you wake up after a night on the sauce and feel great ? .

You can feel great if you continue where you left off.


How much total time spent typing and total money for extra ink have the Brits wasted by using an extra, unnecessary letter to spell words like "color," "labor," etc.?

None as its our language we just let Americans use it.

How long is a piece of string?

long enough to tie you up




why are Pubic hairs curly

it makes them easier to put the curlers in


why are scarf's made in so many colours

So everyone can laugh at the blind dude in the scarf

Why are trains allways late, unless you are, then they are early

leaves on the line, and the wrong type of snow



why are London cabbies the best in the world

Because they come from all over the world to work there.

Why do birds suddenly appear when you are near?

just like me, they long to be, close to you



can bob fix it ?

YES HE CAN!

Was Jamie's torch really magic or did he do to many drugs?

how can it not be magic it lit up wow



can you touch the middle of your back with your tongue?

If you're a flexible friend you can .


Why do banks take enormous pleasure in writing to you to tell you you're overdrawn , Then nick another 30 quid off you for being so ? .

Because they are twats.

Why are all the good things in life bad for you?

the powers that be like to see you squirm as you decide whether or not to indulge!


why are some people such planks?

someone has to be a plank to make everyone else look good


why do we call it free speach

So we don't have to pay

Does an elephant really never forget ?

(Cos i'm never going back to Marwell zoo if it's true ! ) .