We've done it, after sseing HQ's idea of this we thought well what the heck lets give it a try

so we have, hope it goes well

get posting your dumb news everyone

I'll start this off shall I?


STOCKHOLM (Reuters) - A Swedish police officer has confessed he robbed a bank and later investigated the crime himself, telling reporters at the time police had no clues.



A court in the central town of Bollnas Monday officially charged the 36-year-old for the armed robbery on Dec. 17, court documents said Tuesday, adding he had pleaded guilty.


The amount of money stolen was not disclosed but was described as sizeable. An hour after the crime the police officer returned to the bank as a leading police investigator handling the case.


Colleagues became suspicious when he bought a new car in mid-January, paying 219,000 Swedish crowns ($31,400) in cash using banknotes from the robbery, the court said.

I've posted this somewhere else today but I'll put it here as well...

Yet another weirdo finds the face of christ on something - Frying Pan

(This is just too surreal to be true...but it is true)

Referee sends himself off
Tue Feb 1, 9:18 AM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - A referee has sent himself off in an English amateur league match for eyeballing a player who disagreed with a decision.

Andy Wain had to abandon the Sunday league match between Peterborough North End and a Royal Mail side in the 63rd minute after throwing down his whistle and marching up to confront North End's keeper.

"It was totally unprofessional. If a player did that I would send him off, so I had to go," Wain, 39, was quoted as saying by the BBC.

"I heard the keeper say 'It's always the bloody same with you, ref. We never get anything'. It was the last straw, but fortunately I came to my senses."

Northamptonshire Football Association refused to comment

CENTER MORICHES, N.Y. (AP) - A hospital that accidentally placed the amputated leg of a deceased patient in a plastic bag with the personal belongings of another patient apologized Tuesday, and a spokeswoman said officials were trying to determine how the error may have occurred.

"We regret that the situation has happened . . . and we have expressed our feelings to the family," said Nancy Uzo, a spokeswoman for Central Suffolk Hospital in Riverhead on eastern Long Island. She added that the hospital was investigating how the mistake occurred and would take any corrective action to prevent a repeat.

The gruesome discovery was made on Monday, when Christopher Runyan received the personal belongings of his father Paul, 77, who died at the hospital last week. The bag was given to Runyan by employees of Sinnickson's Moriches Funeral Home, who handled the elder Runyan's funeral and collected the belongings for the family from the hospital.

Suffolk County police Sgt. George Kelly said Tuesday that an investigation determined that the severed leg belonged to a man named James Jordan, 82, of Calverton. Jordan had a history of diabetes and the leg was amputated prior to his death on Jan. 13, police said.

The county medical examiner's office was making arrangements to return the leg to Jordan's relatives, Kelly said. Jordan's body has already been cremated, the sergeant said.

"We believe it was just a case of human error."

Radar Police Stumped by Parking Ticket
Fri Feb 4, 2005 02:28 PM ET


BERLIN (Reuters) - An over-zealous policeman slapped a parking ticket on the windshield of a fellow officer's squad car while his colleagues were setting a radar trap to catch speeding motorists in a town in eastern Germany.
"Traffic regulations apply for everyone," Hans-Joachim Schneider, head of the Jessen town office, told the Mitteldeutsche Zeitung newspaper.

The radar police had parked their squad car on the wrong side of the road -- facing the oncoming traffic.

Ananova:

Drivers made to hop like frogs
Truck drivers who are caught speeding in an Indian state are being made to hop like frogs.

Police in Bihar dish out the humiliating punishments instead of taking offenders to court, reports Newindpress.com.

For the most popular punishment, leapfrog, speeding truck drivers have to sit on their haunches, hold their ears and hop for almost half a kilometre.

And the drivers are made to chant the name of the political leader they like most while they are being punished.

One policeman was quoted as saying: "If they remember their leader when they are being punished, it's like they are insulting them. If they have any sense, they won't do the offence again."

LONDON (Reuters) - A Welsh rugby fan cut off his own testicles to celebrate Wales beating England at rugby, the Daily Mirror reported Tuesday.



Geoff Huish, 26, was so convinced England would win Saturday's match he told fellow drinkers at a social club, "If Wales win I'll cut my balls off," the paper said.


Friends at the club in Caerphilly, south Wales, thought he was joking.


But after the game Huish went home, severed his testicles with a knife, and walked 200 yards back to the bar with the testicles to show the shocked drinkers what he had done.


Huish was taken to hospital where he remained in serious condition, the paper said.


Wales's 11-9 victory over England at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff was their first home win over England in 12 years.

*Reads last posting*....*whimpers*

Not a trick you want to repeat if say, England win the football World Cup then HQ?

Thursday February 10, 12:38 PM

Phone company helps end date hell

CANBERRA (Reuters) - It's every single person's nightmare: You're on a date, it's a disaster but there's no way out.

With Valentine's Day looming, a mobile phone company in Australia has come to the rescue with a service offering an escape from the date from hell.

All you have to do is discreetly dial three numbers and then hang up without saying a word.

"Virgin Mobile will call them back a minute later with a perfect excuse to get them out of there. We'll even talk them through what to say," the company, a joint venture of the Virgin Group and Optus, said in a statement on Thursday.

A survey of 402 people by Virgin Mobile found that 53 percent arrange in advance to have a friend call them mid-date to check they are all right or if they need an excuse to get out.

The results showed women were twice as likely as men to use the tactic.

Apologies - I actually this funny; the article rather than the actual event: there are some great quotes to be got from this!

Stabbing in Ikea chaos

By Oliver Finegold, Evening Standard
10 February 2005

A man was stabbed and hundreds of people were crushed as the opening of
the biggest Ikea store in England descended into chaos.

Nine ambulances were sent to the store in north London after reports
that up to 20 people suffered heat exhaustion when the midnight opening
turned into a riot. Staff closed the doors after half an hour amid fears
the stampede could become a Hillsborough-style crush.
Six people were still being treated in hospital today.

More than 4,000 flocked to the new store in Edmonton last night, lured
by adverts promising huge discounts, including sofas at £45 each and bed
frames cut to £30.

As soon as it was declared open, the crowds tried to push their way
through the main doors, leaving many people pinned against the wall.
Security guards were overwhelmed and scores of shoppers were thrown to
the ground.

A man, believed to be in his twenties, was stabbed at a Tesco petrol
station yards from the store. A Scotland Yard spokesman said: "It was
all part of the same incident." Today the victim was "stable".

Paramedics at the scene said they feared a disaster. An ambulance
service source said. "I thought it could be another Hillsborough. It's a
miracle no one was killed."

Video footage showed shoppers fighting over furniture. One man was
pinned against a wall by a burly customer as they argued over a sofa. A
woman was left with blood pouring from her nose after she was pushed
against a wall, while another was heard screaming in pain as she tried
to escape the crush. Shoppers were stretchered into ambulances while
others sat on the floor, where staff gave them first aid.

After half an hour the store was closed - but at the main doors, staff
were reduced to writing signs in black marker pen and holding them up
against the windows to announce the fact. The crowd refused to disperse,
and at one point some outside the main entrance ried to smash down the
glass doors.

Fights broke out between Ikea staff and shoppers. More than 30 police
officers were drafted in to keep the sides apart as firefighters tried
to free customers who were still trapped in the crowd.

Meanwhile, traffic on the North Circular ground to a halt as people who
had been in jams for over an hour simply abandoned their cars.
Ikea apologised for the chaos but a spokeswoman said some shoppers had
"behaved like animals".

Customers criticised the store for being understaffed. Karni Mahmood,
37, from Enfield, said: "I'm amazed at how badly organised it was. Ikea
failed to provide the staff to control such a big event. They are to
blame for this mess. I was near the main doors and I couldn't move in
any direction. I only came here to buy a cheap sofa."

Student Latyia Arpesh, 23, from Tottenham, said: "I was pushed to the
ground. I tried to get up but had people all clambering over me. It was
terrifying, I feared for my life."

Plumber Gary Woodman, 39, said: "My wife was punched in the eye. She's
in a lot of pain. All they had to do was plan this opening properly and
the night would have passed off peacefully."

One woman claimed she suffered an asthma attack in the store after staff
refused to let in a friend who had her inhaler.

However, an Ikea spokeswoman said: "I think it's fair to say we
misjudged it and maybe were a bit naive, but some shoppers behaved like
animals and started shoving and pushing everyone else. There's not much
we can do to stop that.

"We took advice from the police and council over how many people we
would need for the opening. We followed all the safety guidelines."

Ikea staff said they were shocked by the stampede. One said: "When we
opened the doors there was this almighty rush. We didn't know what to do
so we closed the doors straightaway, but some people got stuck in them
and others were rammed up against the glass. We tried letting in people
one by one but they ran through again.

"We were looking forward to selling loads of nice furniture at very
cheap prices. It was never meant to turn into a riot."

Customer Ben Adetimle, 31, an accountant from Leytonstone, said: "I
bought a sofa but as soon as I turned my back someone had stolen it. But
I'm not upset, it's just furniture and it's not worth dying over."
As paramedics treated the injured, many shoppers continued to wheel
their trolleys around the store. A woman with a set of pot plants said:
"I've come all the way from Birmingham for this and I can't come back
empty-handed."

Jilal Patel, 29, from Tottenham, said: "I started queuing at 11am and
nothing is going to stop me from getting my sofa."

Re: IKEA story......Unreal. If I hadn't just seen the article for myself I would think I was still on the "Little Jims" thread and you were taking the mickey, it's that surreal.

For some reason, I'm not entirely unhappy that I missed this one:

Thursday February 10

Woman jailed for ripping off lover's testicle

LONDON (Reuters) - A woman has been sentenced to two and a half years in jail for ripping off her ex-lover's testicle with her bare hands during a drunken brawl after he refused her sex.


Amanda Monti, 24, flew into a rage in May last year after Geoffrey Jones, 37, who had ended their long-term relationship, rejected her advances.


She grabbed him by the genitals, tearing off his left testicle, then hid it in her mouth before a friend of Jones handed it back to him saying "that's yours".


Monti, of Birkenhead, near Liverpool, pleaded guilty to unlawful wounding at an earlier hearing.


Her lawyer said on Thursday her client had little memory of the night.

Pillock.

German thief caught napping

BERLIN (Reuters) - Having broken into a car late at night, a would-be German thief's plans went badly wrong when he failed to prise out its radio, fell asleep clutching his screwdriver, and was woken, then arrested by police.

"The police had an easy time of it," said a spokeswoman for police in the western city of Cologne on Thursday.

The car's owner alarmed police after spotting the man entering the vehicle. By the time officers arrived shortly afterwards, the man was already sound asleep.

Suicide woman banned from rivers

A woman who has attempted suicide four times has been banned from jumping into rivers, canals or onto railway lines.

Bath magistrates granted an anti-social behaviour order (Asbo) against Kim Sutton from Odd Down.

The 23-year-old was rescued three times from the River Avon in Bath last year after trying to take her life.

She was also found hanging from a railway parapet and police had to stop trains to rescue her. Sutton could be jailed for breaking the order.

On Thursday, magistrates sentenced her for three public order offences after deciding at an earlier hearing that throwing herself into a river did constitute disorder.

The Asbo seeks to prevent her doing anything which could cause alarm or distress to the public.


*has lived a year in Odd Down *

Not too sure if this should be on this thread, but I liked this story Not only was there FMD, murders and factories collapsing, but - horror of horrors - Carlisle United was relegated!

Carlisle haunted by ancient curse

LONDON (Reuters) - It is an ancient curse brought up to date, and residents in the city of Carlisle claim it has brought them disasters from disease to the relegation of the local soccer team.


Since the installation of the sculpted granite "Cursing Stone" inscribed with a 16th century curse in one of Carlisle's museums in 2001 misfortune has plagued the city.


Livestock herds around the city on the border with Scotland were wiped out by foot-and-mouth disease, there has been a devastating flood, factories have closed, a boy was murdered in a local bakery and Carlisle United soccer team dropped a league.


Local councillor Jim Tootle insists the stone, designed by artist Andy Altman who arranged the inscription of the 1,069 word-long curse against robbers, blackmailers and highwaymen who plagued the area 500 years ago, is destroyed or removed.


But Altman bridled at the demand.


"It is just illustrating a historical past," he told Reuters. "Bad things are always going to happen, aren't they?"

Monday February 21, 08:36 AM

Severed penis retrieved from toilet is reattached

ANCHORAGE, Alaska (Reuters) - A 44-year-old Anchorage man has had his penis surgically reattached after it was cut off by an angry girlfriend and flushed down a toilet, local police say.


The events unfolded about midnight on Saturday, after the pair had been arguing over an impending breakup, an Anchorage Police Department statement said on Sunday. At some point, the two decided to have sex and the man agreed to let the woman tie his arms to a windowsill.


But the woman used a kitchen knife to amputate her partner's penis and flushed it down the toilet, police said. She untied the man, drove him to a local hospital and was cleaning up the bloody scene when police arrived at the home, according to the statement.


Summoned by the police, workers from the local water utility pulled the toilet up from the floor and were able to recover the severed penis, which was rushed to the hospital for the successful reattachment surgery on Sunday morning.


Police declined to identify the victim, but said his assailant was 35-year-old Kim Tran. She was charged with assault, domestic violence and tampering with evidence, and jailed without bail.

Let that be a lesson for you gentleman

Apparently:

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

8 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

Which ones a 9v battery. I test batteries on my tongue and use sharp knives if I haven't got a screwdriver to hand aswell!

9v battery And I've tested them with my tongue...

yeah so have i, who do they kill?? People with pacemakers??

Woman fined over snail smuggling

Customs officers found dead snails in Ms Anibaba's luggage
A woman who entered the UK with 16st (104kg) of dead snails in her baggage has been fined £400.
Nigerian Surat Oluyemisi Anibaba, 42, was caught during a customs check at Heathrow Airport after arriving from Lagos in Nigeria last Thursday.

Officers searched Ms Anibaba and she was arrested and charged with importing prohibited foodstuffs.

She was also ordered to pay £65 in legal costs at Uxbridge Magistrates' Court on Wednesday.

Customs officers said Ms Anibaba had entered the red channel to declare other items, but a search of her bags revealed the dead snails.


(Presumably they were smuggled in the escargot hold)

Good to see the authorities cracking down on this - snail smuggling is a real problem

Friday March 18, 09:22 AM
Associated Press

Woman sentenced for rhubarb attack
A woman who attacked her elderly brother with rhubarb over a long-running family feud was handed a six-year anti-social behavior order.

Margaret Porter, 50, flew into a rage when she saw her brother William laughing at her as he reversed his Land Rover in the village of Askrigg, North Yorkshire, in May last year.

She marched to an open window and hurled three sticks of rhubarb at the 72-year-old. One caught him smartly in the right eye, leaving him with double vision and needing painkillers, Northallerton Magistrates' Court heard.

I don't get it, what did she do wrong?
Since when was Rhubarb an offensive Weapon?
Great .....I'm growing offensive weapons in my garden......Yippee...How much do you think I'll get for them on the black market?

Sex-deprived wife wins divorce case

ROME (Reuters) - An Italian woman whose angry husband refused for 7 years to have sex with her was awarded divorce damages by Italy's high court this week.


Francesco launched his "sex strike" in the early 1990s to punish his wife, Piera, for taking sides against him in a family dispute over money, according to details of the case reported by local media.


They bitterly separated in 2000 and Francesco, still convinced that she was responsible for the broken marriage, refused to make support payments demanded by Italian courts and repeatedly appealed against them.


But the highest court ruled that Francesco's sexual punishment did not fit the crime, and doomed Piera to perpetual frustration.


"The refusal of affection or sexual attention must constitute the blame for the separation," the court ruled.


For Piera, "satisfaction in life (was) impossible ... along with fulfilment of marriage in its deepest sense."


Beyond support payments, Francesco must pay court costs of several thousand euros.

Thursday March 24, 04:23 AM

Anyone for hot chili fingers?
SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - A diner at a Wendy's fast food restaurant in San Jose, California, has found a human finger in a bowl of chili prepared by the chain.

"This individual apparently did take a spoonful, did have a finger in their mouth and then, you know, spit it out and recognised it," said Ben Gale, director of the department of environmental health for Santa Clara County. "Then they had some kind of emotional reaction and vomited."

Local officials launched an investigation after the incident on Tuesday night and the medical examiner determined on Wednesday that the object was a human finger.

Officials are trying to determine if the finger came in the raw materials Wendy's used to prepare the chili, Gale said.

Wendy's corporate office did not immediately return a call for comment. Wendy's is the third-largest hamburger chain.

It just might be my sordid sense of humour but.............

WENDY'S A KNOWN HAUNT OF THE LOCAL CANNIBALS WORD SPREADS FAST

from BBC News

10 stories that could be pranks - but aren't


Today is 1 April, when jokers set out to fool and the rest of us are on our guard. Here is our annual round-up of some of the day's seemingly spoof news stories which are actually true.


1. A Japanese inventor has devised solar-powered clothes which can top up the battery on an iPod or mobile phone.

2. The Home Office is being asked to pardon Anne Boleyn, 500 years after she was executed, because she was "obviously innocent".

3. A study of men who attended lapdancing clubs found one man, named by researchers as "Graham the philanthropist" who went five times a week and believed "he was helping the women to make money quickly so they could become financially independent".

4. A family of four ate 20,000 Kit Kats to win prizes worth £12,000. "We had them for breakfast, dinner and tea," said 53-year-old Pat McGovern of Teesside.

5. Joss Stone has earned £5m, shooting her into the top 20 of a rich list of young entertainers. Will Young is worth £8m.

Full story
6. A Belgian police training manual which aims to help recruits understand body language has caused a row by likening George Bush's facial expressions to a chimpanzee's.

7. Thousands of visitors are rushing to Death Valley to see a remarkable range of wild flowers which have bloomed there.

8. A tow-truck driver in South Africa has been arrested on suspicion of tampering with traffic lights to make accidents more likely.

More details
9. Conmen in Slough are getting people to pay £400 for laptops, before handing over bags filled not with computer but with bottles filled with water.

Full story
10. Christopher Eccleston, fresh from getting critical acclaim and near record ratings as the new Doctor Who, has quit the role.

Motorist battered by sausage


A motorist is recovering after his nose was broken when a frozen sausage was thrown through the open window of his car, ambulance service officials said.

The 46-year-old man was driving near his home in South Woodham Ferrers, Essex, when the "bizarre incident" occurred, said a spokesman for the Essex Ambulance Service.

"He was driving his car when the offending item came through his open window and hit him on the nose," said the spokesman.

"The man said he was making his way home after work and had the window down because it was such a nice afternoon.

"He said he saw a car coming the other way and felt a searing pain in his nose. He managed to stop his car without hitting anyone else at which point passers-by came to his aid.

"His nose was undoubtedly fractured and he had lost quite a lot of blood ... he decided not to go to hospital but has been left with a very painful and swollen nose.

"I feel very sorry for him - it must have been an incredibly lucky or unlucky shot to get the sausage through a moving car window. I have never seen or heard of anything like this before."

Police said they were investigating the incident on Monday afternoon and wanted to hear from anyone with information.

BANGKOK (Reuters) - Doctors found around 50 maggots in the ears of an 84-year-old Thai man after he went to hospital complaining of an itch.

Wednesday's Nation newspaper said Anan Temtan, who lives in the tsunami-hit southern resort island of Phuket, had used cotton buds to relieve the itching, but had scratched so hard his eardrums ruptured and started bleeding.

"We believe flies might have gone inside his ears to lay eggs, which hatched into larvae and caused the itching," said Somsak Nonthasri, the doctor who treated him.

Somsak, who used tweezers and a small suction device to remove the maggots, said Anan would be kept in for observation for a while to make sure no more eggs hatched.

HE 'WANTED CHEAP THRILL'


A boss stripped naked to interview a woman for a job because he "wanted a cheap thrill".

Saeed Akbar, 35, suggested to his victim that they both undress for the meeting - but the woman refused to strip.


Akbar continued the interview for a short while before leaving the room.

Vincent Lunny, prosecuting, told the court: "Akbar returned shortly after completely naked, carrying only a clipboard.

"The woman was extremely distressed and frightened for her safety. She voiced her disgust and Akbar left and came back this time fully clothed."

Akbar tried to restart the interview, but his victim fled and reported the matter to police.

The father-of-one, from Dunfermline, Fife, pleaded guilty to commiting a breach of the peace. He was placed on the Sex Offenders Register with sentencing being deferred until next month.

Akbar worked as an executive at Alpha Translating and Interpreting Services.

The 25-year-old woman answered an advert for a translator and was invited to attend an interview at the firm's Glasgow office.

Akbar originally told police his strip was part of his "tough ( ) interviewing technique".

He said: "I asked was she okay because if it not, it would not have happened. I am not a rapist, I am not a pervert, I am not a psycho."

But he added: "If I am totally upfront, it was just a cheap thrill, a kick. I wanted a little bit of excitement ( ) that afternoon, that's all."

Amarillo spoof crashes MoD's computers

Soldiers in Iraq have crashed the Ministry of Defence's computers with a spoof video of the number one hit song, Is This The Way To Amarillo.

Troops from the Royal Dragoon Guards shot the home video at their base in al-Faw before emailing it back to army friends in London.

The funny rip-off of the song - released for Comic Relief earlier this year with comedian Peter Kay miming to Tony Christie's 1971 song - proved so popular at the MoD that it crashed the server because it took up so much memory on computers.

As well as bringing down the MoD in Whitehall the video also made it to Strike Command headquarters at High Wycombe, Bucks, and an underground bunker controlling Britain's air defence and warplanes, a paper claimed.

It added that defence chiefs were left with only phones for communication for five hours.

An MoD spokesman said last night: "The video is brilliant. The soldiers maintaining their morale on operations is always important.

"The fact that it proved so popular in the office and caused the system to crash is unfortunate but this did not affect operations and the system is up and running again."

The role of Peter Kay in the video - called Is This The Way To Armadillo - was taken on by lookalike, Staff Sergeant Roger Parr from the Dragoon Guards' tank regiment.

In the video, which was emailed around last Friday - he marches through the Iraqi camp mimicking the comedian and summoning up fellow squaddies along the way.

Two were dressed only in underpants and webbing while others appear with towels while shaving.

At the end of the video three portable loos come into shot with the doors swinging open on two to reveal a couple of naked squaddies sitting on the toilets.

something smells fishy !

Australia nets slippery passenger

There was something decidedly fishy about one female passenger arriving at Melbourne International Airport. Customs officers found 51 live tropical fish hidden under her skirt.

While examining the 43-year-old woman's bags on Friday, officials reportedly heard "flipping noises from the vicinity of her waist".

"An examination revealed 15 plastic water-filled bags holding fish," the Australian Customs Service said in a statement.

The fish were allegedly concealed inside a purpose-built apron.

Experts have yet to establish the exact species of the fish, but if the woman had successfully brought them into Australia, they could have posed potentially serious quarantine, environmental and health risks, customs officials said.

The woman could face up to 10 years in jail and an $80,000 fine if convicted of smuggling wildlife.

It's that time again - top 10 999 calls:

Top 10 strange calls

1. Two young embarrassed children: "Can you send the police up here? Mum and dad went out and we found some handcuffs in their bedroom and put them on and now we're stuck together and don't have a key. Come quick, they'll be home soon."

2. A woman rang up screaming that she had been to her local supermarket and bought bananas. When she got them home, a tarantula crawled out. It turned out to be a leaf from the garden.

3. "My husband's late home from work. Where is he?" (Police said: "A call like this could be important ... but this was just a personal moan").

4. "What's the weather like in Carmarthen? There's snow in Brecon."

5. A school rang up to say there was a pigeon in the building and wanted police to get it out.

6. A man rang to say that he had received an electricity bill but had already paid it. It turned out he had changed supplier so had two bills.

7. "Get the police now, there's a peacock on my lawn."

8. Man: "My next door neighbour is in my garden". Police: "Have you asked him what he's doing?", Man: "No. Get the police straight away." (It turned out he was gardening).

9. "I've lost my snake in the house."

10. A teenager rang to say he missed the bus home from school and wanted a lift from the police as his dad could not pick him up.


BBC story

Thursday June 30, 02:44 PM

Taiwan bowled over by toilet-theme restaurant

TAIPEI (Reuters) - It may take a strong stomach to eat curry or chocolate ice cream out of a toilet bowl, but a commode-themed restaurant in Taiwan does booming business serving up just that.

The Martun, or toilet in Chinese, restaurant in the southern port city of Kaohsiung boasts lengthy queues on weekends as diners wait for a toilet seat in its brightly coloured tile interior.

Food arrives in bowls shaped like Western-style toilets or Asian-style "squat pots".

Manager Hung Lin-wen said the original inspiration came from a toilet-shaped spaceship in a Japanese cartoon. The theme has attracted droves of novelty-seeking young people who come to play with their food and gross out their friends.

"We think the theme is special, and the food is tasty," Hung said.

But no matter how delicious, a few customers still find the combination a little hard to swallow.

"The taste is good, but I still feel disgusted when I look at it," said diner Lin Yu-may.

Wednesday July 20, 11:55 AM

Police sent nude shopper home with warning

BERLIN (Reuters) - German police let a nearly naked shopper go home after she told them she was getting groceries in the nude because she lost a spin the bottle contest, a police spokesman in Cologne said on Wednesday.


"We're a tolerant city that is open to the world," said spokesman Burkard Jahn. "She could have been arrested for disturbing the peace, but we decided to let her go home with a verbal warning to dress appropriately next time."


The 35-year-old Cologne woman entered the 24-hour shop at 4 a.m. wearing nothing but an unbuttoned jeans jacket, Jahn said. He said police decided to let her go because few people and presumably no small children saw her at that time of day.

Why do I never get invited to play games like that!

The British contribution to peace and stability in Iraq and the wider Middle East can be found here

Woman sets herself on fire in petrol mishap
By Julia Medew
July 22, 2005 -


A woman was taken to hospital this morning after she accidentally set herself on fire.

Senior Constable David Fitzgerald said police believed the woman was filling her car with petrol from a jerry can in Thornbury about 1.30am. Struggling in the dark, the woman used a cigarette lighter to see what she was doing, sparking the fire, he said.

An ambulance spokeswoman said the woman received minor burns and was taken to the Austin Hospital in a stable condition.

- theage.com.au

You know you read stuff like that and think, 'not in this day and age' and then you don't want to think about it because it confirms your thoughts that there really is stupid people out there.

Today, a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration. That we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively. There is no such thing as death, life is only a dream and we're the imagination of ourselves.
Here's Tom with the weather.
Bill hicks


sorry i always find his stuff so funny